I love Stuff White People Like and I can laugh at What Bogans Like. I am not a bogan, but I'm not a snob either. I hate snobbery, reverse snobbery, elitism and anti-intellectualism equally - but actually I think I dislike elitism the most.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Real Estate

Excellent: sustainable urban village in Hong Kong, Shanghai etc
Mock-Worthy: sustainable urban village in Melbourne "growth corridors"

Excellent: flat/unit in city
Acceptable: flat/unit in Docklands
Mock-Worthy: flat/unit in suburbs

Excellent: renovated cottage in inner west
Mock-Worthy: renovated house in outer east

Acceptable: renovating
Mock-Worthy: building

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Love / Anti

Love: macaroons
On the cusp (about to cross over): cupcakes
Anti: muffins

Acceptable / Mock-worthy

Acceptable: DVD
Mock-worthy: Blu-Ray

Acceptable: Vanity Fair
Mock-worthy: Hello

Acceptable: The View
Mock-worthy: Oprah

Acceptable: Arena, GQ
Mock-worthy: Zoo Weekly

Acceptable: Vanity Fair
Mock-worthy: Hello

Acceptable: The Vampire Diaries
Mock-worthy: Twilight
Acceptable: Chadstone, Southland, Victoria Gardens
Mock-worthy: Forest Hill Chase, Highpoint, The Glen

Acceptable: IKEA, Freedom Furniture
Mock-worthy: Dare Gallery, Adriatic Furniture

Acceptable: Vietnam
Mock-worthy: Thailand

Acceptable: Pellegrini's
Mock-worthy: Starbucks. (OK to duck into Gloria Jeans on occasion if nothing else is around).

Acceptable: Fish and chips at Queenscliffe, Portsea or Williamstown
Mock-worthy: Fish and chips from the local take-away

Acceptable: Spring Racing Carnival / Formula One GP from a marquee / corporate box
Mock-worthy: Spring Racing Carnival / Formula One GP from the public area

Acceptable: Eating like the locals when visiting a foreign city
Mock-worthy: Eating like the locals in your own city

Acceptable: Rabbits
Mock-worthy: Ferrets

Acceptable: Bollwood blockbusters
Mock-worthy: Hollywood blockbusters

Acceptable: Decking, sunrooms
Mock-worthy: Tiles, al-fresco areas

Acceptable: growing herbs
Mock-worthy: growing flowers

Acceptable: Bike to work
Mock-worthy: Drive to work

Acceptable: Daycare
Mock-worthy: Family Daycare (you'd probably get a bogan family)

Acceptable: Dying hair darker
Mock-worthy: Dying hair lighter

Acceptable: "Bronzer"
Mock-worthy: Fake tan

Acceptable: Betting on horses, sports events and elections
Mock-worthy: Betting on poker machines and lottery tickets

Acceptable: Local bakery
Mock-worthy: Bakers Delight, Krispy Kreme

Things Smug People Like:

Feeling smug about not being a bogan

Spiked 1960's wall clocks

Wooden and tin children's toys

Old celebrity baby names (Ava, Audrey, Elizabeth), not new ones (Angelina, Scarlett, Britney)

Pretending they don't watch Australia's Funniest Home Videos or Wipeout

Expensive things that look old

Judiciously-chosen size for their plasma TV.  Not small, obviously - but not wall-sized either. The biggest size possible before crossing over into bogan-sized.

Bakelite radios

1950's housewife kitchen appliances in cute colours.

Tumbledown, overgrown "natural" gardens.

Meccano - not Lego


Mocking the Cashed Up Bogan's neo-Georgian cube McMansion with home theatre, spa bath, rumpus room and ensuites - but kind of envying the comforts.  (Their inner city miner's cottage or art deco bungalow is their dream house - but dammit there is no storage and cleaning the grouting sucks).

Cookbooks of choice: Stephanie Alexander, Neil Perry, Tana Ramsay, Donna Hay, Margaret Fulton (retro!) - not Jamie or Nigella.

Mismatching furniture

Championing local government school - but only if you live near a good one

Coloured-frame oblong eye glasses

Black tunic tops

Layered tee-shirts

Leggings - but only if they are black and don't have stirrups at the bottom

Crochet - let's face it, easier than knitting

Home made cakes

Picnics which don't involve take-away food

Mocking suburbia

The Botanical Gardens

Favourite bookshops: Hill of Content, Readings.  Purely for emergencies: Dymocks, Angus & Robertson

Medium-sixed dogs. Smallest: Spaniel. Largest: Labrador.

Two cats

Political party of choice: was the Labor Party, now the Greens

Winter holidays: Tasmania, spa retreats, wineries. 
Summer holidays: sneak into the Gold Coast or Noosa, on the quiet.